8) Five things that are most important to you in a future mate
Years ago I'm sure my list would have included some physical traits like older than me or taller than me, but as I've gotten older I place value on traits a man has control over. Also, I should not expect something I can't bring to the table myself. It was hard narrowing it down to 5 things, but here goes: (some posts that helped were Heather Lindsey's post on the top things she wanted in a husband and http://sheismore.com/the-husband-list-12-non-negotiables/)
- He has a servant's heart
- I'm not saying he is a pushover, or not confident but he does not think of himself more highly than he should. He is not egoistical, does not have the "self-made man" mindset. He knows he is nothing without Christ. Like Jesus, he serves others and treats them with respect whether it's his family or strangers. He works diligently, and is "salt and light" on his job. He is a good steward of his resources (time, money, etc.) He takes responsibility for his actions and can admit when he is wrong.
- He intentionally pursues and romances me
- This is basic, but I must know that he is interested in me. He does not use my interest in him to see how much he can get from me without committing. He puts effort into developing the relationship, ensuring he is the leader of it. He sets standards and expectations, with marriage as the goal. Once we are together he continues to make me feel cherished and safe.
- He loves to learn/seeks truth
- He does not entertain ignorance. He has passions he pursues.
- He has a sense of humor
- He doesn't take life too seriously. Minor issues don't stress him out. He loves to laugh.
- He is really saved
- He loves God more than me, and our courtship reflects that. He loves God and hates sin, and his life reflects that. He hears and follows what God says in the Bible and to him personally. He seeks to grow spiritually and will guide his future family to do the same.
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