The Single Woman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge!
20) Describe your most difficult breakup and what you learned from it
My most difficult breakup was during my last relationship. We had actually been engaged for about a week but I decided to end it. I realized that you can date anyone, but you can't marry anyone. Dating is fun (I should have been courting), but marriage is serious and permanent. I learned that you should discuss your values with your partner, and they should align. It's easy to have a relationship built on surface level attraction and compatibility, but it must be based on deeper emotional and spiritual ones.
21) How would you pitch a reality show about yourself? To what network?
This is funny because I've been thinking about this. My show would be like The Office, but about IT. It would also be about my life, after moving back to my hometown, and long distance relationships with my friends from college. What would be different is that it's from an African-American perspective. You don't see Black geek culture much in the media. I would try to pitch it to BET, but I doubt they would pick it up. Perhaps ABC would.
22) What fictional character in a movie, tv show, or book do you identify with and why?
I just asked my best friend this and she said Simon from the Chipmunks or Marcie from Peanuts lol. But I'm still thinking of people myself.
23) Talk about a moment when you got annoyed with a married friend,
a person in a relationship, or a person with kids (Be honest! No
judgment!)
24) If you could relive ONE day of your life, what would it be? And would you change anything?
25) Describe a moment when you “paid it forward.” What happened and how did it feel?
That last time this happened was when I gave money to a man who was asking for it on the side of the road. I felt grateful that I had something to give . I know some people think people are lying about their situations when they do that, but I felt that was between him and God.
Thursday, January 23, 2014
Monday, January 20, 2014
SW Blogging Challenge 15 - 19
I am in the process of completing these. I've been out of state for a friend's wedding.
15) Narrate a conversation between you and someone in your life who you never had closure with (a friend, an ex, a family member, etc.) What would you say? What would they say? What outcome would you hope for?
This conversation would would most likely be with my uncles, specifically with the one that passed. I wanted to tell them I wish they could have been a positive influence on my life. Yes, they always told me to do good, but I wish they would have practiced what they preached. I've come a long way from living in public housing to graduating from college to starting a career, but I wondered how much further I could have been (emotionally, self-esteem wise) with positive male role models in my life. They could have been they support I needed after my parent's divorce, and helped with dealing with guys, etc. with my father living in another state.
I'm not sure what they would say. I'm not sure what would make a person want to run in the opposite direction of God's will for their life, when He has their best interests at heart. I know they lost their parents at a young age, which had a large impact on them. The outcome I would hope for is acknowledgement of their ways, even if they did not decide to change.
16) If you planted a time capsule right now of your life to be opened in 20 years, what would be in it?
A program of my friend's wedding I was just in, a list of all the concerts I've been to in the last two years with some video from the events, some photos from my work social events, a lesson plan from the children's bible studies I teach.
17) What are your spiritual beliefs and how do they impact your relationships/relationship status?
I am a Christian who follows biblical rules on relationships. To most people, it would seem old fashioned but I know it's in my best interests, as all God's plans are.
18) If you could have a conversation with yourself in high school, what would you say?
I would say that life gets better, and to tell myself to be more confident. Also to try to eat better.
19) What is something about you that people would be surprised to learn?
Probably the extent of my nerdiness lol.
15) Narrate a conversation between you and someone in your life who you never had closure with (a friend, an ex, a family member, etc.) What would you say? What would they say? What outcome would you hope for?
This conversation would would most likely be with my uncles, specifically with the one that passed. I wanted to tell them I wish they could have been a positive influence on my life. Yes, they always told me to do good, but I wish they would have practiced what they preached. I've come a long way from living in public housing to graduating from college to starting a career, but I wondered how much further I could have been (emotionally, self-esteem wise) with positive male role models in my life. They could have been they support I needed after my parent's divorce, and helped with dealing with guys, etc. with my father living in another state.
I'm not sure what they would say. I'm not sure what would make a person want to run in the opposite direction of God's will for their life, when He has their best interests at heart. I know they lost their parents at a young age, which had a large impact on them. The outcome I would hope for is acknowledgement of their ways, even if they did not decide to change.
16) If you planted a time capsule right now of your life to be opened in 20 years, what would be in it?
A program of my friend's wedding I was just in, a list of all the concerts I've been to in the last two years with some video from the events, some photos from my work social events, a lesson plan from the children's bible studies I teach.
17) What are your spiritual beliefs and how do they impact your relationships/relationship status?
I am a Christian who follows biblical rules on relationships. To most people, it would seem old fashioned but I know it's in my best interests, as all God's plans are.
18) If you could have a conversation with yourself in high school, what would you say?
I would say that life gets better, and to tell myself to be more confident. Also to try to eat better.
19) What is something about you that people would be surprised to learn?
Probably the extent of my nerdiness lol.
Tuesday, January 14, 2014
SW Blogging Challenge Days 13 & 14
The Single Woman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge
13) Describe how you met the last person you texted and talk about your friendship/relationship
The last person I texted was my best friend, Tiff. We went to college together in Tallahassee, but we first met in New Orleans in 2006 during spring break. We were volunteering with an organization called Katrina on the Ground. I think Tiff was assigned to the 9th ward, while I was in Plaquemines Parish. All the groups from our college were in one place at the beginning though. We didn't talk much, but that's how we initially met. Then that summer we both took the same physics I class (we were both business majors and our business school required us to take physics I and II) and we were both sitting in the front row. We studied a lot together, which turned into a friendship. Our sophomore year we pledged a professional business co-ed fraternity. We eventually became roommates til we both graduated in 2010. We still keep in contact with other and she visited me for my birthday this year. We will be reuniting this weekend for another friend from college's wedding in which we are both bridesmaids. I think I met her at the right time when I was coming out of my shell. I don't have many close friends, but I am so grateful I met Tiff.
14) Describe the last moment you felt really, truly blissful
Blissful is defined as "Extremely happy, full of joy". I have two moments: 1) when I paid my car off a couple of months ago. Being debt free is one of my financial goals, and now I am much closer to it. I had a five year loan that I paid off a few years early. 2)Soon after I paid my car off, my car was broken into a couple of months ago. I didn't have any money in it but I did have a us airways gift card that had $100+ on it. I was upset but forgave the person and prayed for them. I have to get a plane ticket in Jan. so I was looking around online then it hit me to check southwest and I had over 10k points about to expire at the end if the year that I never would have thought about if I used the gift card. The thief steals, but God restores! It was blissful.
13) Describe how you met the last person you texted and talk about your friendship/relationship
The last person I texted was my best friend, Tiff. We went to college together in Tallahassee, but we first met in New Orleans in 2006 during spring break. We were volunteering with an organization called Katrina on the Ground. I think Tiff was assigned to the 9th ward, while I was in Plaquemines Parish. All the groups from our college were in one place at the beginning though. We didn't talk much, but that's how we initially met. Then that summer we both took the same physics I class (we were both business majors and our business school required us to take physics I and II) and we were both sitting in the front row. We studied a lot together, which turned into a friendship. Our sophomore year we pledged a professional business co-ed fraternity. We eventually became roommates til we both graduated in 2010. We still keep in contact with other and she visited me for my birthday this year. We will be reuniting this weekend for another friend from college's wedding in which we are both bridesmaids. I think I met her at the right time when I was coming out of my shell. I don't have many close friends, but I am so grateful I met Tiff.
14) Describe the last moment you felt really, truly blissful
Blissful is defined as "Extremely happy, full of joy". I have two moments: 1) when I paid my car off a couple of months ago. Being debt free is one of my financial goals, and now I am much closer to it. I had a five year loan that I paid off a few years early. 2)Soon after I paid my car off, my car was broken into a couple of months ago. I didn't have any money in it but I did have a us airways gift card that had $100+ on it. I was upset but forgave the person and prayed for them. I have to get a plane ticket in Jan. so I was looking around online then it hit me to check southwest and I had over 10k points about to expire at the end if the year that I never would have thought about if I used the gift card. The thief steals, but God restores! It was blissful.
Sunday, January 12, 2014
SW Blogging Challenge Days 11 & 12
The Single Woman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge
Days 11 & 12
11) Your worst/funniest/most embarrassing date
I'm not sure if it was necessarily a date but I met up with this guy at a spoken word event at a college a couple years ago. He wanted to walk me to my car after it was over since it was late. I couldn't remember where I had parked and we walked around for a long time before we found it. It was pretty awkward and is now the reason I have an app that remembers where I park.
12) Your proudest accomplishment
The accomplishment that I am most proud of graduating from college debt free. This is due to two major scholarships I received. Those scholarships required a lot of effort, but it was well worth it.
Days 11 & 12
11) Your worst/funniest/most embarrassing date
I'm not sure if it was necessarily a date but I met up with this guy at a spoken word event at a college a couple years ago. He wanted to walk me to my car after it was over since it was late. I couldn't remember where I had parked and we walked around for a long time before we found it. It was pretty awkward and is now the reason I have an app that remembers where I park.
12) Your proudest accomplishment
The accomplishment that I am most proud of graduating from college debt free. This is due to two major scholarships I received. Those scholarships required a lot of effort, but it was well worth it.
Thursday, January 9, 2014
SW Blogging Challenge Day 9 & 10
The Single Woman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge
Combing days 9 & 10
9) Your favorite “weird/funny single behavior” – Anything you do that is uniquely YOU and that living alone allows you to do (For example, I sometimes dance around the house with my cat to Frank Sinatra)
I haven't done this since I started taking Zumba classes, but I used to turn off all the lights in my apartment, turn on some music and dance my heart out. It used to be a lot of fun and relieved stress.
When I was in middle or elementary school I won a stuffed dog in one of those claw machines. He's been on my bed ever since then. And that's been though college, and moving to and from the Southwest from FL.
I have 5 daily alarms on my phone during weekdays. They help keep me focused.
10) Google the meaning of your name and talk about how it fits or doesn’t fit you
My first name meanings (according to www.sheknows.com)
I definitely agree with some of the traits for both names. The first name makes me not only think of physical strength, but mental strength as well. My dependence on God in situations I've been in have made me strong.I follow the rules, and am only rebellious when they don't make sense to me.
Combing days 9 & 10
9) Your favorite “weird/funny single behavior” – Anything you do that is uniquely YOU and that living alone allows you to do (For example, I sometimes dance around the house with my cat to Frank Sinatra)
I haven't done this since I started taking Zumba classes, but I used to turn off all the lights in my apartment, turn on some music and dance my heart out. It used to be a lot of fun and relieved stress.
When I was in middle or elementary school I won a stuffed dog in one of those claw machines. He's been on my bed ever since then. And that's been though college, and moving to and from the Southwest from FL.
I have 5 daily alarms on my phone during weekdays. They help keep me focused.
10) Google the meaning of your name and talk about how it fits or doesn’t fit you
My first name meanings (according to www.sheknows.com)
English Meaning:
The name is an English baby name. In English the meaning of the name is: She ascends.
The name is an English baby name. In English the meaning of the name is: She ascends.
SoulUrge Number: 11
People with this name have a deep inner desire to inspire others
in a higher cause, and to share their own strongly held views on
spiritual matters.
Expression Number: 5 People with this name are excited by change, adventure, and excitement. They are dynamic, visionary and versatile, able to make constructive use of freedom. They fight being restricted by rules and conventions. They tend to be optomistic, energetic, intelligent, and to make friends easily. They may be changeable, restless, untidy, and rebellious.
My middle name meanings:
Expression Number: 5 People with this name are excited by change, adventure, and excitement. They are dynamic, visionary and versatile, able to make constructive use of freedom. They fight being restricted by rules and conventions. They tend to be optomistic, energetic, intelligent, and to make friends easily. They may be changeable, restless, untidy, and rebellious.
My middle name meanings:
French Meaning:
The name is a French baby name. In French the meaning of the name is: gift from God.
The name is a French baby name. In French the meaning of the name is: gift from God.
Hebrew Meaning:
The name is a Hebrew baby name. In Hebrew the meaning of the name is: Close to God. Feminine form : Who is like God? Gift from God.
The name is a Hebrew baby name. In Hebrew the meaning of the name is: Close to God. Feminine form : Who is like God? Gift from God.
SoulUrge Number: 1
People with this name have a deep inner desire to use their
abilities in leadership, and to have personal independence. They would
rather focus on large, important issues, and delegate the details.
Expression Number: 4 People with this name tend to be orderly and dedicated to building their lives on a solid foundation of order and service. They value truth, justice, and discipline, and may be quick-tempered with those who do not. Their practical nature makes them good at managing and saving money, and at building things in the material world. Because of their focus on order and practicality, they may seem overly cautious and conservative at times.
Expression Number: 4 People with this name tend to be orderly and dedicated to building their lives on a solid foundation of order and service. They value truth, justice, and discipline, and may be quick-tempered with those who do not. Their practical nature makes them good at managing and saving money, and at building things in the material world. Because of their focus on order and practicality, they may seem overly cautious and conservative at times.
I definitely agree with some of the traits for both names. The first name makes me not only think of physical strength, but mental strength as well. My dependence on God in situations I've been in have made me strong.I follow the rules, and am only rebellious when they don't make sense to me.
Wednesday, January 8, 2014
SW Blogging Challenge Day 8
The Single Woman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge
8) Five things that are most important to you in a future mate
Years ago I'm sure my list would have included some physical traits like older than me or taller than me, but as I've gotten older I place value on traits a man has control over. Also, I should not expect something I can't bring to the table myself. It was hard narrowing it down to 5 things, but here goes: (some posts that helped were Heather Lindsey's post on the top things she wanted in a husband and http://sheismore.com/the-husband-list-12-non-negotiables/)
8) Five things that are most important to you in a future mate
Years ago I'm sure my list would have included some physical traits like older than me or taller than me, but as I've gotten older I place value on traits a man has control over. Also, I should not expect something I can't bring to the table myself. It was hard narrowing it down to 5 things, but here goes: (some posts that helped were Heather Lindsey's post on the top things she wanted in a husband and http://sheismore.com/the-husband-list-12-non-negotiables/)
- He has a servant's heart
- I'm not saying he is a pushover, or not confident but he does not think of himself more highly than he should. He is not egoistical, does not have the "self-made man" mindset. He knows he is nothing without Christ. Like Jesus, he serves others and treats them with respect whether it's his family or strangers. He works diligently, and is "salt and light" on his job. He is a good steward of his resources (time, money, etc.) He takes responsibility for his actions and can admit when he is wrong.
- He intentionally pursues and romances me
- This is basic, but I must know that he is interested in me. He does not use my interest in him to see how much he can get from me without committing. He puts effort into developing the relationship, ensuring he is the leader of it. He sets standards and expectations, with marriage as the goal. Once we are together he continues to make me feel cherished and safe.
- He loves to learn/seeks truth
- He does not entertain ignorance. He has passions he pursues.
- He has a sense of humor
- He doesn't take life too seriously. Minor issues don't stress him out. He loves to laugh.
- He is really saved
- He loves God more than me, and our courtship reflects that. He loves God and hates sin, and his life reflects that. He hears and follows what God says in the Bible and to him personally. He seeks to grow spiritually and will guide his future family to do the same.
Tuesday, January 7, 2014
SW Blogging Challenge Day 7
The Single Woman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge
7) Where you are in your life vs. where you thought you would be at this point
I am currently 26 and single. I'm older than my mom was when she gave birth to me. I was sure I would have been married by now, with at least one child. Perhaps that would have happened if I was the woman I am now in college. More confident and not so desperate to be in a relationship that I ended up with the wrong guys. I wasn't exactly sure what I wanted to do with my career, but I have found something I enjoy doing. I am curious to see how it progresses.
7) Where you are in your life vs. where you thought you would be at this point
I am currently 26 and single. I'm older than my mom was when she gave birth to me. I was sure I would have been married by now, with at least one child. Perhaps that would have happened if I was the woman I am now in college. More confident and not so desperate to be in a relationship that I ended up with the wrong guys. I wasn't exactly sure what I wanted to do with my career, but I have found something I enjoy doing. I am curious to see how it progresses.
Monday, January 6, 2014
SW Blogging Challenge Day 6
The Single Woman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge
6) Sound off on the quote “Every woman has the exact love life she wants”
I both agree with this quote, with some variation. For instance, every godly woman has the exact love life God wants for her in His timing. If she is submitted to Christ, she will not entertain randoms or settle for less than God's best. When she gets in a courting relationship she will be pursued intentionally with chivalry and not be expected to compromise on her values. A desperate woman might get in a relationship with a man with worldly standards who she would never marry. It might be what she thinks she wants at the time, but in my opinion it won't end that way.
6) Sound off on the quote “Every woman has the exact love life she wants”
I both agree with this quote, with some variation. For instance, every godly woman has the exact love life God wants for her in His timing. If she is submitted to Christ, she will not entertain randoms or settle for less than God's best. When she gets in a courting relationship she will be pursued intentionally with chivalry and not be expected to compromise on her values. A desperate woman might get in a relationship with a man with worldly standards who she would never marry. It might be what she thinks she wants at the time, but in my opinion it won't end that way.
Sunday, January 5, 2014
SW Blogging Challenege Day 5
The Single Woman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge
5) The biggest misconception you think people have about single life
I'm sure there are many, but what I've encountered is that all people are staying single longer simply because they don't want to settle down. If I met the right guy after we courted for some time I would expect us to get married. Some people out there might be afraid of commitment, but not all, especially as people get older. As I've mentioned before true godly men are few and far between, so it takes longer to meet them.
5) The biggest misconception you think people have about single life
I'm sure there are many, but what I've encountered is that all people are staying single longer simply because they don't want to settle down. If I met the right guy after we courted for some time I would expect us to get married. Some people out there might be afraid of commitment, but not all, especially as people get older. As I've mentioned before true godly men are few and far between, so it takes longer to meet them.
Saturday, January 4, 2014
SW Blogging Challenge Day 4
The Single Woman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge
4) Your biggest fear as a single person.
My biggest fear as a single person is that I will never have children, or have them late in life. I teach youth bible study and children's church most weeks so I am constantly interacting with children, to never have one of my own would be a letdown. I have one brother and one half-sister and it is up to us to continue my parent's lineage. I don't want my family's name to die out. However I suppose my brother is the only one who will keep his last name after he marries. My half sister, who is 3 months younger than me, has a son who just turned four. The younger you have children the more energy you will have which children can require a lot of. Also, the longer you will able to spend time with them and later generations before you pass away. The older you are, the more advanced you are in your career, which requires more of your time. I'm sure it makes work/life balance that much harder. I think the job position I have now would be ideal for me to have children, before I seek a promotion, but my timing is not God's timing. I must be grateful for that because His thoughts and ways are higher than mine.
4) Your biggest fear as a single person.
My biggest fear as a single person is that I will never have children, or have them late in life. I teach youth bible study and children's church most weeks so I am constantly interacting with children, to never have one of my own would be a letdown. I have one brother and one half-sister and it is up to us to continue my parent's lineage. I don't want my family's name to die out. However I suppose my brother is the only one who will keep his last name after he marries. My half sister, who is 3 months younger than me, has a son who just turned four. The younger you have children the more energy you will have which children can require a lot of. Also, the longer you will able to spend time with them and later generations before you pass away. The older you are, the more advanced you are in your career, which requires more of your time. I'm sure it makes work/life balance that much harder. I think the job position I have now would be ideal for me to have children, before I seek a promotion, but my timing is not God's timing. I must be grateful for that because His thoughts and ways are higher than mine.
Friday, January 3, 2014
SW Blogging Challenge Day 3
The Single Woman Blogging Challenge Day 3
Describe a moment or a day when being single was really awesome.
The first thing the popped in my mind was when I got my job offer for my current job about two years ago. It required me pack up all my belongings and move 2,000 miles back to my hometown. If I was married, I might not have even been able to accept the job because my husband might not have wanted to move. I did not have much time to move either, which would have been harder if it wasn't just my belongings that needed to be shipped. We would have had to find a place to stay perhaps without even seeing it. Being single, I was able to move back into my parent's house while I was looking for an apartment. If I was in a courting relationship it might have became long distance which would have been very challenging. I have never been in a long distance relationship but it must be difficult to be so far from your significant other. Being single, I was able to focus just on what I felt God was calling me to do.
Describe a moment or a day when being single was really awesome.
The first thing the popped in my mind was when I got my job offer for my current job about two years ago. It required me pack up all my belongings and move 2,000 miles back to my hometown. If I was married, I might not have even been able to accept the job because my husband might not have wanted to move. I did not have much time to move either, which would have been harder if it wasn't just my belongings that needed to be shipped. We would have had to find a place to stay perhaps without even seeing it. Being single, I was able to move back into my parent's house while I was looking for an apartment. If I was in a courting relationship it might have became long distance which would have been very challenging. I have never been in a long distance relationship but it must be difficult to be so far from your significant other. Being single, I was able to focus just on what I felt God was calling me to do.
Thursday, January 2, 2014
SW Blogging Challenge Day 2
SW Blogging Challenge
2) Describe a moment or a day when being single really sucked.
Just one? I get this thought every time I have to carry groceries alone to my apartment, or I have to walk somewhere at night. Those many conversations when everyone is talking about their children or grandchildren, and now with social media making posts about them too. And don't get me started on Valentine's Day. But I've learned to encourage myself. God is love, and knows me better and loves me more than my future husband ever will. He can also protect me better than any man.
I'm an independent introvert, so I don't mind doing things alone. What saddens me is not having someone to grow with. Someone who helps me become better and vice versa. Someone to share inside jokes with.
But I'm sure when I'm married there will times when I'll long for my single days. Not saying that it won't be great, but different.
*Update: I am sick now and it would be nice to be taken care of, oh well*
2) Describe a moment or a day when being single really sucked.
Just one? I get this thought every time I have to carry groceries alone to my apartment, or I have to walk somewhere at night. Those many conversations when everyone is talking about their children or grandchildren, and now with social media making posts about them too. And don't get me started on Valentine's Day. But I've learned to encourage myself. God is love, and knows me better and loves me more than my future husband ever will. He can also protect me better than any man.
I'm an independent introvert, so I don't mind doing things alone. What saddens me is not having someone to grow with. Someone who helps me become better and vice versa. Someone to share inside jokes with.
But I'm sure when I'm married there will times when I'll long for my single days. Not saying that it won't be great, but different.
*Update: I am sick now and it would be nice to be taken care of, oh well*
Wednesday, January 1, 2014
SW Blogging Challenge - Day 1
The Single Woman’s 30-Day Blogging Challenge
1) Your response to everyone’s favorite question: “And why are YOU still single?”
The simple answer here is, "...because I'm not being pursued." Also, logically, I am not meeting anyone to be pursued by in the first place. I see the same people everyday and every guy I meet is married or has a girlfriend. If God is really hiding me from my future spouse until His appointed time, He is doing a great job! It seems like good Christian men are an endangered species, especially on Sundays at church. Is there something I need to address? I have seen through co-workers and friends things I need to work on. I have also been reading books regarding singleness and preparing for marriage. I strive to be able to bring something to the table to my future marriage - emotionally, spiritually, financially, etc. I also keep myself in shape by going to the gym. I am far from perfect, but I'm dedicated to growth.
I have wondered am I smart/pretty/etc. enough to be pursued? I have to trust that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. As I grow closer to Him, I am being developed into a woman after His heart first.
1) Your response to everyone’s favorite question: “And why are YOU still single?”
The simple answer here is, "...because I'm not being pursued." Also, logically, I am not meeting anyone to be pursued by in the first place. I see the same people everyday and every guy I meet is married or has a girlfriend. If God is really hiding me from my future spouse until His appointed time, He is doing a great job! It seems like good Christian men are an endangered species, especially on Sundays at church. Is there something I need to address? I have seen through co-workers and friends things I need to work on. I have also been reading books regarding singleness and preparing for marriage. I strive to be able to bring something to the table to my future marriage - emotionally, spiritually, financially, etc. I also keep myself in shape by going to the gym. I am far from perfect, but I'm dedicated to growth.
I have wondered am I smart/pretty/etc. enough to be pursued? I have to trust that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. As I grow closer to Him, I am being developed into a woman after His heart first.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)